


I Can't Pretend Anymore

by nafeefajaz



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Hogwarts Eighth Year, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 13:48:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18661651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nafeefajaz/pseuds/nafeefajaz
Summary: To put it in simple words..... Harry is losing feelings for Draco





	I Can't Pretend Anymore

Draco Malfoy is head over tails in love with Harry Potter. Everyone knew that, It is a known fact. Anyone with eyes and brains to understand the love in his eyes and bright grins while he stares at Potter will know this.

But it looks like Harry is starting to lose his touch with these things. These feelings, feelings he never had gotten in return. Harry just couldn't take it. He feels like he is betraying the love Draco has for him. But staying for the sake of not hurting Draco has the reverse effect on Harry as he feels like ripping his raven locks off. He loves Draco, sure, he loves the wondrous git who always seemed to have a sneer on his face seemed to melt just for Harry and leave the mask off whenever he is near the green eyed boy, but Harry couldn't understand why he feels so distant, so off. Why he notices all the flaws about Draco that he once found cute, now to be annoying.

Harry was just bathing in the sunlight near the Black Lake on one of his free periods just finishing his rants about his feelings towards Hermione who was just staring at Harry, like she was trying to decide if she should lecture him once again or feel sympathetic or to bang her head on a wall. "You both were good for this long, It will be two years in six months since you started dating Draco, Harry you can't hurt him, he will literally kill himself-" Harry interrupted her, "He will actually kill himself, 'Mione" Hermione sighed, having no idea on how to solve this, "Exactly"

"Just, just, let's think about this after NEWTs I don't think it would be a good idea to add more stress onto this situation," Harry suggested rubbing his face in frustration, moving his glasses on top of his head in the process. "Yeah, You're right" She agreed and turned to wards the Black Lake looking out lost in thought, when they both heard the voice, the voice of the person Harry fell madly in love with in the beginning of all this chaos. But now, all that is left is the nagging feeling like something is off. And all he can blame is himself.

"Good evening babe, I missed you so much today," Draco said dropping in beside Harry resting a gentle kiss onto Harry's cheek and nuzzling his face on the crook of Harry's neck, breathing in, which resulted in Harry to get goosebumps all over his body. He smiled leaning onto the warmth of Draco's body. "I missed you too sweetie, how was your day?" Harry tried giving Draco his full attention but all that is running through his mind just wouldn't help.  _'You know you actually lost all feelings towards Draco right?' 'The only solution is to break this off Harry'_ Hermione's and his earlier conversation playing in his head on repeat. As he lost himself in his thoughts he didn't notice Draco finishing his whole story from the morning til now and he had asked Harry a question which he didn't seem to register as well until he saw a hand waving infront of his face, "you okay dear? You seem lost in your thoughts" concern laced through Draco's voice, Harry blinked a couple times and noticed that Hermione had left them to it. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine just thinking sorry I didn't pay attention." Draco brushed it off with his hand and grinned kissing Harry's hand with was intertwined between them tightly. Which just made Harry sick to the stomach with guilt and regret.

Soon enough, without his knowledge, he was shedding tears and Draco went full alert, panicking, eyes wide with terror. "What is it? Are you hurt? Why are you crying? Please don't baby, did I do something wrong? I'm sorry if I have" Draco started babbling with tears of his own streaking his beautiful cheeks.

Harry, shaking his head violently held Draco's face in the palms of his hands but not before wiping at his bloodshot eyes harshly. "You didn't do anything love, I just, I can't, I'm so sorry but I can't do this anymore, I can't hurt you like this, I can't betray the love you have for me anymore, I can't accept this love you have for me which I know someone else deserves. I don't deserve this, I can't do this," As Harry started talking Draco just couldn't stop the sobs wracking his body and shaking his head in earnest.

"I don't want anyone else, I want you, I need you, I love you Harry" Draco said his voice breaking, listening to this makes Harry's heart shatter, the the boy who always hide his emotions behind a mask, breaking in the palms of his hands. And Draco continued, "You never hurt me, I'm the one who hurt you, I'm the one who makes you cry and sad everyday, I can't make you happy, I'm the one who can't make you smile, I'm the one who doesn't deserve your love, you love me so much and I don't know how to give it back to you"

Harry was thankful everyone were inside the castle and it was just him and Draco so no one would see the blonde shattering in his hands. Who might completely break at what Harry says next.

"You don't make me sad and cry baby, It's just...I know you deserve someone better, much, much better than me, I don't want to hurt you anymore Draco, but I'm tired of pretending," Harry paused, looking at Draco's eyes which were the most beautiful ones in the whole world. "I love you, I really do, but I don't like this relationship, I'm not saying I don't want it forever, I just don't want it now, not at the moment, maybe a few years between us? Apart?" To which Draco held on tightly to the hands that were still holding his face, and sobbing harder, mouthing 'No' repeatedly. "You're the only source of happiness in my life Harry, please don't do this," Draco pleaded. 

But all Harry did was shake his head and lean in to give a final kiss to his lover...Ex-lover now. The minute their lips touched, all Harry felt was empty, nothingness a contrast to what he felt at the beginning. Their first kiss. Their lips lingered for a bit longer Draco holding Harry's head firmly pressed towards him, tears pouring down his face. Harry pulled away, ripping Draco's hands off him and stood up, leaving Draco behind to whisper his name in the dark.

**Author's Note:**

> I did not expect it to turn out like this. Honestly, I know it's a bit bad but I'm learning. Hope whoever reads it likes it and please leave comments on how the writing is and I know most of you won't see this. Let's just hope you read this. And whoever read this AU thank you. It's not perfect but it's my first ever Drarry and/or any fic to be precise.. hehe
> 
> Give me tips on correcting my writing please  
> Thank you again


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